Just a thought by coppi

“Being in a hurry. Getting to the next thing without fully entering the thing in front of me. I cannot think of a single advantage I’ve ever gained from being in a hurry. But a thousand broken and missed things, tens of thousands, lie in the wake of all the rushing…. Through all that haste I thought I was making up time. It turns out I was throwing it away.” – Ann Voskamp

I love this because my life has been in a rushing mode it seems forever.  I thought I had to accomplish so much to be loved.  As I have said many times before, it wasn’t until everything around me seemed to crash in one night.  I never felt so alone, afraid, fearful, and everything that goes along with “why”.  It happened when my marriage of thirty-two years was over, leaving a residue of side affects that would fill the Grand Canyon.  At least I thought so.  It’s many years past now, but at times I still feel the awful pain and disappointment of that time.  When I put my head down at night, one of my prayers is “May I never forget what you have done for me Jesus”.  I depended on my faith and trust in the words and promises in the Bible (I still do) as I never want to forget what He did for me.  It did not happen overnight and I did have wonderful people put in my life along the way which was a blessing, but my constant companion was the God of my childhood.  Why am I writing about this again? But as I stated above sometimes the memory of that time creeps in my emotions and I feel the pain.  Feelings……When you think you have dealt with them and they are gone, surprise you when they creep back in.  Maybe just maybe that is why my life has always been “doing and not being”……doing keeps emotions ‘abey’.